


Matchmaking: Start!

by godofaliases



Category: Henry Stickmin Series (Video Games)
Genre: Anyways, Confessions, Crushes, First Dates, HAHAHAH I MADE A TAG, Hurt/Comfort, I'm Bad At Tagging, M/M, Matchmaking, Queerplatonic Relationships, Self-Insert, There we go!, Trigender Character, Wingman Sam, and also this was made out of spite for the stereotype of, and if you dont respect that then i will steal your knees, enjoy, fuck you this is gonna be fun to write AHAHAH, grumpy and mean aroace, oh i forgot one tag, sam is enby, take that all you exclusionists, they use they/them pronouns, they're also aromantic and asexual, uhhh
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-25
Updated: 2020-12-04
Packaged: 2021-03-10 05:06:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,239
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27528922
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/godofaliases/pseuds/godofaliases
Summary: Dave is pining hard for Jacob. Sam has had just about enough of this, and puts together an elaborate plan to set the two up.
Relationships: Dave Panpa/Jacob Rose
Kudos: 7





	1. The Discovery

**_T i m e: 9 : 15 P . M_ **

**_D a t e: J u n e 1 0 t h, 2 0 1 1_ **

**_S t a t u s: P i n i n g_ **

It started out like any normal day. Dave Panpa hopelessly pining for Jacob Rose, like he had for Rupert Price at one point. He had hoped nobody had picked up on yet, but, of course, Sam Turner noticed. And honestly? They were done with seeing it. Of course, Dave didn't expect for them to ask _in the middle of their shift._

"Hey, Dave?" Sam said, tapping on his shoulder slightly. Dave jumped slightly and turned to face the blond enby. 

"Yeah? What's up Sam?" He asked, tilting his head slightly. Sam crossed their arms.

"Oh you know what's up Dave. You've been hopelessly pining to Jacob. When are you going to tell him?" They asked, wasting no time and just getting to the point. Dave immediately flushed up and held his hand to Sams mouth, trying to prevent them from saying anything else.

"SHH-! Do you realize he could've heard-?!" Dave quietly yelled at Sam.

"Realize he could've heard what?" Zach poked his head in from the other room. Dave squeaked at the sudden arrival of the brown haired man. Sam took Dave's hand of their mouth and said "Dave's pining for Jacob again!" while Dave hid his face in his hat. 

"Oooo! Matchmaking time!! Hold on, I need my boys-" Zach said excitedly. He pulled out his walkie talkie. 

"Uhh Rover and Barnes, would you mind coming to the main hall of the museum for a bit? We have a situation involving Panpa." 

A few seconds later two more additional voices would come out of the walkie talkie. 

"Alright, this better be good though. This is the 4th time, Dave! And I just got this job 6 days ago!"

"Got it boss- uh- be there in a few minutes."

After the walkie talkie cut out, Sam looked at Zach, confused. 

"Hold on, I know Billy, but whos Rover??" They asked.

"Oh, that's a new recruit. His name is Berlin Rover." Zach responded. 

"I thought she was a girl?" Sam questioned.

"What? I thought they went by they/them pronouns.." Dave cut in. They all stared at each other, each sharing a mutual confusion. Just as they were about to talk about it, Berlin and Billy showed up.

"Hi guys!" Billy greeted. Berlin, on the other hand, was just fumbling with their scarf and raised an eyebrow at seeing the three sharing the same confusion.

"Uh, what's gotten you guys all shaken up?" They asked. Dave, Zach, and Sam all turned their heads to look at Berlin.

"Uhh.. if you don't mind me asking.. what.. are your pronouns?" Dave quietly asked. Berlin rolled their eyes playfully.

"Dude. Did you already forget? I'm trigender. I use all three pronouns." They replied. Sam lightly smacked Zach on the back of the head.

"Gee, thanks smartass- you almost had us think we were constantly misgendering him!" Sam quietly yelled at him.

"Uh, do you have any preferred pronouns?" Dave asked. Berlin shook her head.

"Nope. I'm comfortable with all of them!" She replied. Zach breathed out a sigh of relief.

"Well, that's good to know.. anyways! That's not what we called you both here to talk about!" He gathered his composure and stood up straight. Berlin leaned against the wall while Billy tilted his head in confusion. 

"Well? What are we here for then?" He asked. Dave hid his face in his hat again as Sam spoke.

“Dave over here is crushing on Jacob.” They said flatly. If Billy and Berlin had water in their mouths, they would’ve spat it out for sure at this revelation. 

“WAIT- LIKE  _ THE  _ JACOB?? JACOB ROSE??” Berlin questioned, trying to make sure they were hearing everything right. 

“What other Jacob is there, Berlin?! There’s no doubt about it-! Dave is head over heels in love for him!” Billy confirmed, clapping his hands excitedly. Berlin fixed their posture and sighed.

“Matchmaking time?” He asked. Zach nodded.

“Matchmaking time.” He responded. Berlin glanced over at Billy, who was happily jumping up and down, Sam, who was looking straight back at her, Zach, who was teasing Dave, and, well, Dave, who was redder than a tomato. Berlin cocked an eyebrow.

“You guys can have fun with that, but I’m not really cut out for this.” They turned around to leave, before Sam put a hand on their shoulder. Berlin looked back at them, confused.

“Rover.”

“Turner.”

And just like that, the whole room fell silent. Just as Sam never called anybody by their last name, neither did Berlin. Dave, Zach, and Billy sat there, staring at the two with fearful looks in their eyes. Sam smirked at them, and instantly, they all knew Dave was done for. 

“Alright, alright, I’ll help Panpa over there get together with Jacob.” They put their hands up in defeat. Sam jumped up and down in happiness.

“Yayy!! Matchmaking, start!” They exclaimed in happiness.

“Roll credits.” Berlin said flatly. Sam, Zach, Billy, and Dave all looked at him in confusion. 

“What do you mean?” Billy asked. Berlin shot a glare at him and shrugged.

“I don’t know, what do YOU think I mean?” He asked sarcastically. Billy pouted and punched him in the shoulder playfully.

“Come on dude, you always say things like that and expect us to get it! The LEAST you could do is tell us what you mean this time!” Billy continued. She looked down at him, and smiled.

“Nah.” She said gleefully.

“ROVVERRR!!”

END CHAPTER 1.

**A/N: Hey! Sorry the first part of the story is introducing most of the characters, I just wanted to show yall my own interpretations of them, along with Berlin Rover, my self-insert. Next part will feature Sam, Zach, Billy, and Berlin talking to Jacob and setting him up on a blind date with Dave. See you all until then!!**

**-XOXO Glitch/London/Skip**


	2. The Set-Up

**_T i m e: 5 : 40 PM_ **

**_D a t e: J u n e 1 2 t h , 2 0 1 1_ **

**_S t a t u s : ?_ **

Berlin was just walking around like they usually did on their shift. Honestly? They didn’t care much if someone broke in. Of course, that was unless the person threatened to steal some of the most precious things in the museum, like the Tunisian Diamond. But that wouldn’t happen! He checked his phone and he got a text message from Sam.

enby envying: don’t forget what you’re looking for Lin-

Berlin smiled slightly.

capital of germany: dw about it lmaoo  
i think i already see him-  
catch you later sammy

enby envying: don’t call me that again Berlin-

Berlin put away their phone and walked up to Jacob, tapping lightly on his shoulder.

“Hey, dude.” She said. Jacob turned around and his eyes slightly rose in surprise. 

“And you are..?” He asked. Berlin took out her phone and started texting to a group chat she, Sam, Zach, and Billy all had.

CHATNAME: Matchmakers

capital of germany: hey guys i found him lmaoo

enby envying: THAT WAS QUICK

outsider barns: WOOO

tying the knots: wait where are you rover

capital of germany: near the medieval display

enby envying: alright we’re on our way there

capital of germany: don’t take too long

Berlin put his phone away before responding. 

“The name’s Berlin. Berlin Rover. Nice to meet you Jacob.” He took out his hand, waiting for Jacob to shake it. Jacob slowly took his hand and shook it.

“Berlin Rover? That sounds familiar. Didn’t you used to work at the prison where Henry Stickmin was being kept?” He asked. Berlin shrugged.

“I was. Made friends with Rupert Price and Dave Panpa while I was there. Good guys. Rupert’s just a bloody bitch.” They responded. Jacob snickered, but stopped when he heard Dave’s name.

“Wait, Dave Panpa?” He asked. Berlin nodded.

“Well, yeah, who else?” They asked. Jacob shrugged and looked away, his face flushing up. Berlin looked at him and raised an eyebrow.

“You alright there buddy? You’re turning a bit red.” 

Jacob was about to answer before suddenly getting cut off by the loud voice of Sam.

“BERLIN!” They yelled. She winced at the loud sound before turning back to them. Berlin waved at them as Sam looked at Zach.

"Zach! We were looking for you!" They happily chirped. Billy was trying to help Zach breathe as Jacob tilted his head in confusion.

"Really-? Also, uh, is Zach okay over there-?" He pointed at the struggle as Sam glanced back and ran to help him. 

"Oh no- Zach- Zach breathe-" Sam told him. Berlin groaned and reached into his scarf only to pull out a water bottle and gave it to him.

"Drink." He said bluntly. Zach clutched the water bottle and started drinking quite quickly.

"Nooo, don't drink fast!!" Billy cried. Sam pinched the bridge of their nose and stifled a laugh. Zach finished drinking the water and took a deep breath. 

"Alright, alright, I'm okay- anyways, this isn't what we came here to talk about!!" Zach straightened his posture and cleared his throat as Billy snickered a bit.

"Yeah!! Jacob Rose!! We have come to propose to you!! A BLIND DATE!!" Billy exclaimed, pointing a finger at a very confused Jacob. 

"Wait wait wait, all that happened and you're telling me you came here to set me up on a blind date??" He asked, tilting his head in confusion. Berlin sighed and put up their arm.

"Jacob Rose, we are here because we are offering you a blind date. A yes or no will be fine." 

He thought for a moment.

"Am I allowed to ask questions about this blind date?" Jacob asked. Berlin put their arms behind their back and sighed.

"Shoot."

"Well, first, who am I going with on this blind date?" He asked. Sam groaned.

"What's the point of a blind date if you know who you're going with man?!" They exclaimed. 

"I'm starting to think it was a bad idea to let you ask questions." Berlin said, adjusting his glasses. Jacob glared at him before sighing in defeat. 

"Well I guess I really don't have a choice." He shrugged. Berlin bowed as the rest of the group started cheering. Jacob rose an eyebrow. 

"Why are you so much more formal than the others?" He asked. Berlin stared him in the eyes and shrugged.

"I'm more laid back when I'm not on a mission. Either way, thank you for your time. We will text you the time and location of the date. Farewell for now." They walked away, scarf grabbing onto the others and dragging them away as well. Jacob stood there, utterly confused at what just happened.

* * *

**_T i m e: 7 : 45 P M_ **

**_D a t e: J u n e 1 1 t h, 2 0 1 1_ **

**_S t a t u s: Y e a r n i n g_ **

Dave was in the lounge, resting his head on his hand as he thought about Jacob. Feelings suck, he would tell you. Thankfully, Sam, Zach, Billy, and Berlin all have the night shift, so when they walked in and saw Dave sitting there, they knew what they had to do. Sam slowly walked up to Dave and tapped on his shoulder, breaking him out of his little trance.

"Hm-? Oh, hi Sam-! What's.. what's up? Why are they with you?" He looked behind Sam and pointed to Berlin, Billy, and Zach all arguing with each other, Berlin saying to wait and Zach and Billy being impatient. Sam looked behind them and signaled to them to shut their yaps, and they did.

"Don't worry about them-! They're here for fun. Anyways, uh, we have a proposition for you-!" They smiled brightly. Dave tilted his head. He opened his mouth the speak but was cut off by Sam continuing.

"You wanna go on a blind date?" They asked. Dave flushed up immediately and hid his face with his hat, letting out flustered noises. Berlin rested their head on Sams and continued for them.

"Don't worry, it's nobody bad. And you're free to ask questions, if you wish."  
Sam nodded at Berlins words as Dave still took a moment to process everything going on. Zach and Billy stayed behind talking about.. uh.. who knows actually- But they were there and talking. Dave peeked out of his hat then looked at Berlin, then Sam, then Billy, then Zach. 

"Uh.. am I allowed to ask who I'm going on a date with..?" He asked. Berlin audibly groaned. 

"He's like the last one- No, you aren't. What's the point of a blind date if you don't know who you're going with?" They replied, throwing up their hands and letting their scarf droop over Sams eyes. Dave mentally facepalmed, of course. That IS the whole purpose of blind dates. He thought for a moment before nodding.

"I guess..? What's the worse that could happen?" He said. Berlin smiled and dragged Sam, Billy, and Zach away.

"Thanks Dave!"

Dave sat there utterly confused about what would happen, but he had faith that the 4 knew what they were doing.

A/N: next chapter is gonna be the date so this is gonna be fun- oh and also Happy New Years yall- see ya latteeerrrrr


End file.
